Under Warranty

July 13, 2007, 10:00 am; posted by David
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Heavenly Technologies
Gateway Drive
Beulah, HE 77777

Attention: IT Department

Dear Sir:

I received one of your New Creation packages in November 1978, I’m having some trouble, and I was hoping to get some assistance. I opted for the New Heart and New Mind, initially, then in the spring of 1980, I added the Holy Spirit Baptism. It should all be on file.

The first issue I’m having is with virus protection. The Prayer Life process turns itself on automatically every morning when I log in and tries to scan the entire hard drive sector by sector. Usually I don’t have time to watch it scan thousands of files, so I end up shutting it down before it finishes. I think that may be causing some of my problems with locking up and crashing. Is there a way to change the settings? I have no problem with the Anti-Spyware Bible Reading module. It works fine and has turned up a lot of malicious code.

Another problem is with my communication protocols. When I first received the package it took me some time to establish the proper default settings for things like traffic, neighbors, co-workers, etc., but eventually I got everything working right. But in most cases now the default setting seems to have returned to frustration instead of patience; shortness instead of meekness; anger instead of joy. You know, stuff like that. Is there any kind of fix that could come in a download, or do I need an altar ca — I mean, service call?

The last thing I wanted to ask about was a complete reboot. At times my mind and heart have locked up during critical times and I’ve had to shut things down in the middle of a major operation. I know that when that happens, sometimes strings of code get omitted on the hard drive, which can cause problems. Is that why I sometimes still feel ghost images of things I know I’ve been forgiven for? Is that what makes all my responses to you so slow? After all, the system has been running continuously since 1978, but I’ve heard there may be a way to restart it all, a complete reboot.

Any help you could give me would be most appreciated.

David F. Sweet
1005 Blind Blvd
Opelika, Imnumber 11111