Bweinh! Answers Your Questions

August 30, 2007, 1:15 pm; posted by
Filed under Articles, Humor, Steve  | 5 Comments

This week marks the end of our sixth full month at, and over those months, you (our wonderful visitors) have seen fit to grace us with your presence tens of thousands of times. Many of you simply type in the name of our site, or perhaps click a bookmark in your browser — but there are others who find us every day at the end of a search string. It is to this last group that I devote this post.

I’ve been keeping track of some of the questions that brought you to our site and I have some answers for you!

What is the name of the man that talks at the front of the church?
Good question, good question! That man is Zed’rokh, Destroyer of Worlds, of course!

Unless you mean the man everyone else can see too, in which case it’s Rev. Johnston, and he’s asked me to remind you the restraining order is still fully in effect. Back pew, please. Cashiers’ checks only.

Can you fail Navy boot camp and what happens?
Another great question. Unfortunately, you can fail Navy boot camp. Remember our friend Job Tate and those updates he was giving us from his trip through boot camp last month? He talked about a bunch of people who flunked out because of physical or mental weakness. Yeah, it’s sad, but it can happen.

Oh, what happens to them after they fail? I’m not quite sure. I’d ask Job, but — as you’ve seen — he’s been kind of absent ever since he went to the second-level boot camp, you know, where they run the really thorough background checks to make sure you’re not joining the military to help your tiny little state secede, uh, from the inside and whatnot, learning all our secrets.

Huh. Wonder what happened to him…

Can I still get a job even though I’m on probation?
I’m glad you asked! The answer is absolutely!! There are plenty of employers willing to take a risk on a young man or woman who simply got caught up with the wrong crowd fighting at the mall, made a small mistake out on the highway, or maybe shoplifted from the local Piggly Wiggly. It’s not the end of the world to wind up on probation; just look at what Tom has made of his life!

How do you pronounce Shaalan?
Just like it’s spelled, and slowly. “Suh – hah – all – ay – ah – hall – lah – la – an – nuh.”

Remember to keep the emphasis on the A.

Ballet boot sleeping blog?
Yes, master Zed’rokh…message received…plan underway…transmission complete…


5 Comments to “Bweinh! Answers Your Questions”

  1. Steve on August 30th, 2007 5:18 pm

    This post is already #6 in Google for “Can you fail Navy bootcamp?” I know because we had a visitor asking that very question two hours after I posted it…

  2. Rose on August 30th, 2007 8:28 pm

    My education teacher visited a prison to perform a graduation ceremony. [They weren’t graduating from prison, they were graduating from the school that was set up in the prison.] Anyway, one of the inmates told my teacher that when he got out, he wanted to become a teacher. My professor then went back to his office and did a little research. I am pleased to inform you that even if you have done time, you can still be eligible to mold America’s young minds.

  3. David on August 31st, 2007 9:26 am

    You can serve time in jail, be a former juvenile delinquent, and even worse be a Yankee, and still be a copier salesman and jackleg preacher in the South.

  4. Dan on September 3rd, 2007 11:52 am

    Is there anything worse than being a Yankee?

  5. David on September 4th, 2007 9:26 am

    Being a Redsox.

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