The $2.99 Gas Guarantee

01/15/2009, 1:02 am -- by Steve | No Comments

Not everyone is entirely thrilled about today’s lower gas prices, I bet. Watching a taped episode of Lost tonight, I saw a long-forgotten commercial for Chrysler’s summer ’08 gimmick, the $2.99 gas guarantee. Remember? They promised to subsidize gas purchases for those who bought their new cars, so that the buyers would never have to pay more than $2.99 per gallon.

Back then, when the average price for gas was over $4 per gallon, this probably seemed like a great idea. But that didn’t last long — soon the price of gas began its freefall. And these days, those people probably feel a little cheated. After all, they gave up as much as $2,000 in incentives in exchange for three years of three-dollar
gas, only to see the whole world get it twice as cheap by November. Now some part of them has to be secretly rooting for a burst pipeline, a natural disaster, trouble in the Middle East — anything to get them back on the right side of this deal!

WWF, WWE… what’s the difference

01/14/2009, 7:57 pm -- by Djere | 2 Comments

A commercial for WWF (the World Wildlife Fund) just came on TV, pleading with me to save the polar bears.

Did you know most of them will be dead in “our children’s lifetime!”?

Despite the clear environmental message, I couldn’t help wondering for over half the commercial, “what do polar bears have to do with wrestling?”

Three Links (Vol. 17)

01/14/2009, 12:42 pm -- by Steve | No Comments

— Have you ever noticed that Andy Rooney turned 90 today? A comedian invented the Andy Rooney Game, where his commentaries are edited down to their barest essentials — the first and last sentences. Brilliant!

— This is a little old, but I just saw it: an etymological map of the world that uses the modern English translation of every place name. You can see a slice of America here — or as the map puts it, the United States of the Home Ruler, home of the proud state of New Wild Boar.

— Both presidential candidates loved the scapegoat idea of closing Guantanamo, but they never said much about what we’d do with all those nasty terrorist suspects we’ve been holding there. No surprise, though, that the alternative is moving them onto US soil, filling up our military bases and granting them constitutional rights. Great idea.

The Rising Sun

01/14/2009, 9:30 am -- by David | 4 Comments

GodÊ¼s provision is as faithful as the sunrise, and just as predictable. We know so well that the sun will rise each day, that we actually print the time in the newspaper the day before. We know that seedtime and harvest will continue; we’re so sure of just when they will happen that the Farmer’s Almanac lists the dates for each region of the country — exactly when spring will arrive, and when we can plan on a harvest. GodÊ¼s provision is just as measurable and visible in our lives.

Last week, out of the blue, my boss paid me on Thursday, instead of Friday. I suspected something must be up. What happened next? An unexpected expense that had to be paid Friday morning. After paying that, writing a tithe check, and putting a tank of gas in our car, I informed my wife that we had $60 left for the whole week. Groceries alone run $225. Gasoline is $75.

God’s provision is so constant that I actually enjoyed sitting back to see what would happen next. A $10 check in my wallet that I had forgotten about. A $10 check in the mail. A $70 rebate for a Christmas phone arrives on Saturday. $150 in cash set aside last week by my wife. A $58 check we did not expect.

IÊ¼m not saying that I never worry — itÊ¼s hard not to. But some days itÊ¼s like reading the paper, knowing when the sun will rise so you can sit out on the hill and watch it happen.

Quote of the Day, 1/14/09

01/14/2009, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“There are no accidents in my philosophy. Every effect must have its cause. The past is the cause of the present, and the present will be the cause of the future. All these are links in the endless chain stretching from the finite to the infinite.” — A. Lincoln

Quote of the Day, 1/12/09

01/12/2009, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“Just as some things are too strange for fiction, others are too true for journalism.” — P.J. O’Rourke

Best of Steve — Human Nature

01/9/2009, 12:00 am -- by Steve | No Comments

Originally printed January 10, 2008.

I like a lot more people than I trust.

Part of this is because I know myself. I’m aware of what I think about and what I have thought about. I remember the things that I have done, wanted to do, could be capable of doing.

Much of it is because I know other people, generally. How they lie. Why they lie. What motivates them. People, in the flesh, in the mind, are not really very different from one another; it’s just a matter of which flaws they possess. One woman can handle huge sums of money faithfully, yet fly into a violent rage when angry at her children. One man might remain untempted to stray from his wife, but struggle with the desire for mind-altering substances.

I get paid to read about people now, sometimes, and the terrible things they have done, to help determine whether their punishment was fair. It would be nice to imagine, as Solzhenitsyn wished, that the solution to evil is simply finding all the bad people and destroying them. Unfortunately, that won’t work — or better put, it works only if done most thoroughly. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

And so I find it can be true that a man guilty of heinous crimes against some children can nonetheless be beloved by others, can be hailed, perhaps rightfully, as a pillar of his church and community. It seems incongruent, it seems wrong. How can a person do both? How can, for instance, a successful and married evangelical pastor purchase (at least) methamphetamine and, in all likelihood, carry on a homosexual affair?

Life is easier and less threatening for us if we can divide people into well-defined, recognizable groups — the inhuman monsters who rape and murder, the unwashed dissolute who “live in sin,” and then the nice people, whether Christians or not, who pretty much get along with everyone and try to do their best.

But by pretending that what drives the ‘worst’ among us is somehow different from the evil that still exists in our own heart, we set ourselves up for a grand disappointment — by ourselves, and by our heroes. And when this self-deception leads us to marginalize our own sinfulness (after all, we’re not beating children or taking meth, right?), we skip happily down the path of slow and steady compromise, the broad way that leads to destruction, an evil anesthesia that scars the heart and leaves us less and less convicted with every sin we rationalize.

Quote of the Day, 1/8/09

01/8/2009, 2:30 pm -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“When I come before the judgment throne, I will plead the promise of God in the shed blood of Jesus Christ. I will not plead any work that I have done, although I will thank God that he has enabled me to do some good. . . I will not plead that I had faith, for sometimes I was unsure of my faith, and in any event that would be to turn faith into a meritorious work of my own. . . Whatever little growth in holiness I have experienced, whatever strength I have received from the company of the saints, whatever understanding I have attained of God and His ways ”” these and all other gifts I have received I will bring gratefully to the throne. But in seeking entry to that heavenly kingdom, I will, with Dysmas, look to Christ and Christ alone.

Then I hope to hear Him say, ‘Today you will be with Me in paradise,’ as I hope with all my being ”” because, although looking to Him alone, I am not alone ”” He will say to all.” — Fr. R.J. Neuhaus (5/14/36-1/8/09)

Chick Tracts: Something For Everyone!

01/8/2009, 9:00 am -- by Steve | No Comments

What were these guys hiding?

If you picked any of these answers you’re a winner!! Chick believes them all!

Yes or no, turkey?!

The New Year?

01/7/2009, 1:00 pm -- by David | 1 Comment

New Year’s Day has never been a very cheerful time for me. I still remember New Year’s Day 1980. I was at a skating party with my college friends while a song played on the radio: “Are You Ready for The ’80s?” A flirtatious girl was skating with me; she batted her eyes and asked, coyly, “Are you ready for the ’80s?”

“No,” I said. “I wasn\’t done with the 70\’s yet.”

And I meant it: there were too many unresolved issues and disappointments. I wasn\’t ready to move on.

“Is this the new year, or just another night?
Is this the new fear, or just another fright?
Is this the new tear, or just another desperation?”

But I can\’t remember a New Year quite like this one. Everywhere I look I see despair. The headlines are dominated by economic collapse, here and around the world. At home my wife has received word that her school’s paychecks are safe only through May, while the company I work for is suffering through the worst time I have seen in my 15 years there. The last two weeks of the year I literally sold nothing; everything we sell is financed, but we have no one to do the financing.

Short-term, this means a 60% drop in pay. Long-term, it means no job.

Everyone hopes things will change with the New Year, but I can\’t see the difference between 11:59:59 on December 31, 2008 and 12:00:00 on January 1, 2009. Maybe I\’m just a pessimist.

“It\’ll be a day like this one when the world caves in,
when the world caves in,
when the world caves in.”

There has never been another time in my life when we were fighting simultaneous wars on two fronts. At least being hated by half the world for being who we are is familiar. Sadly, so is seeing our troops die for far-off people who don\’t always seem to appreciate it. And then there\’s the Middle East erupting in violence again.

“Is this the Kingdom or just a hit and miss?
I miss direction most in all this desperation.”

After all these years, I still obsess over these disappointments, these unresolved issues. I feel like a man who can\’t run anymore, so I\’ve slowed to a crawl — too burdened down; too encumbered; too confused about which way to go, even on spiritual issues, including church.

We have a daughter, our older one, who has always been a master at twisting words. I remember catching her in a lie once as a teen, and she told us it was “faith” — she was simply “speaking things that were not as though they were.”

Sometimes I struggle with which is faith and which is the lie. Is it faith to pretend things are not the way they are? Or is that the lie?

“Does justice ever find you? Do the wicked never lose?
Is there any honest song to sing besides these blues?”

I\’ve had many good pastors over the years. I remember one of them, Pastor Larkin, preaching that David didn\’t close his eyes and pretend Goliath was a dwarf. He looked him up and down — took his full measure — then said, “Who are you to defy the armies of the Living God?”

So I have no fear of the future, just a dislike for the depressing atmosphere of the present. And I will always prefer the honest song — even if it is the blues.

(All lyrics from “The Blues” by Switchfoot, from Nothing is Sound)

Quote of the Day, 1/7/09

01/7/2009, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“If you want to know the people around you, find out what they read.” — J. Stalin

Joke of the Day, 1/6/09

01/6/2009, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud, a red-faced colonel at the wheel.

“Your jeep stuck, sir?” asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside.

“Nope,” replied the colonel, handing him the keys. “Yours is.”

Quote of the Day, 1/5/09

01/5/2009, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective. Unless a man starts on the strange assumption that he has never existed before, it is quite certain that he will never exist afterwards. Unless a man be born again, he shall by no means enter into the Kingdom of Heaven.” — G.K. Chesterton

A New Year, A New Chick Tract

01/5/2009, 12:40 am -- by Steve | No Comments

{democracy:314}

The Hum of its Parts

01/5/2009, 12:15 am -- by Steve | 1 Comment

The frighteningly homogenized specter that is American popular music is laid bare in this video, an astounding and technically brilliant mashup of 2008’s top 25 singles, created by the aptly dubbed DJ Earworm.

Over the orchestral fullness of backing track “Viva La Vida,” the piece holds up musically — in truth, vastly outshining most of its ingredients. But the true measure of its genius comes not from the seamless integration of the songs, but from their respective spliced videos, which serve as a virtual laboratory report on our cultural fixations.

Row after row of gyrating, underclothed women, blurring what remains of the line between empowerment and objectification. Preening, posing men in dollar store sunglasses, their caps perfectly askew. Money. Diamonds. Exclusive nightclubs. If it weren’t for Sara Bareilles’ nose and Coldplay constantly banging on stuff, I’m not sure I’d be able to tell anyone apart.

In the end, the concept is so successful because, with rare exception, these already ARE one song, certainly one video. By editing away much of what identified the individual artists, DJ Earworm not only created a catchy mix of radio-ready hooks; he also exposed the underlying superficiality of popular music and American culture, in a Trojan horse of a tune that satirizes as it showcases. And the fact that most viewers won’t even give it a second thought simply reinforces the truth of the message.

Is it a news flash that popular culture is shallow, base, repetitive, and perverse? No. But any reminder is a good one. Don’t tell me you’re sorry, music industry — ’cause you’re not.

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