What DID It Take in the ’90s to Burn the Charts?
January 15, 2009, 11:39 pm; posted by Steve
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If only Hammer had known…
1990 — Nepotism
1991 — Exaggerated, Schmaltzy Boasts
“There’s no love, like your love. And no other could give more love.”
It takes a special kind of man to rhyme “love” with “love” — then immediately do it again.
1992 — Ripping Off The Temptations
“Girl, I know you really love me. You just don’t realize. You’ve never been there before.”
Also, you dig that I look like Urkel in these enormous glasses.
1993 — Ripping Off Dolly Parton
1994 — A Deal With the Swedish Devil
1995 — Growing Up in Compton
1996 — Rump-Shaking Rhythm
“Heyyyyy, Macarena! Aiyee!”
There were people who needed a computerized lesson to learn this dance?!
1997 — Shameless Exploitation of Tragedy
1998 — Filthy Grinding
“Baby, us dancing so close — ain’t a good idea.”
Singing about it? Also not such a good idea. The musical equivalent of a trenchcoat flasher.
1999 — A Truly Stunning Amount of Botox
Source: The Billboard Hot 100
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