The Council’s Ruling — Worst Year

02/17/2009, 2:20 pm -- by | No Comments

At various times, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — Who has had the worst 2009 thus far?

Djere delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Steve and David:

Whether he knows it or not, Blagojevich. Enough already, pal. Enough lying, enough bribery, enough hair. And hopefully, it’s just going to get worse for him.

 

Steve concurs in the result, joined by David:

Blagojevich. Others have had a bad year, but only one man is a national punchline for his actions AND his appearance.

 

Connie concurs in the result:

Blago — and I’m pretty sure it’s only going downhill from here.

 

Job dissents:

Marcus Schrenker. His business went off a cliff, his wife filed for divorce, he was indicted on federal charges, he unsuccessfully and spectacularly failed at faking his death in a plane “crash” — and endured it all in a bruisingly public way.

 

Tom dissents:

Bernard Madoff. If the recession were a god, he would be its avatar.

 

MC-B, Josh, Mike, and Kaitlin played no part in the determination of this issue.

The Council’s Ruling — Important State

02/10/2009, 11:15 pm -- by | No Comments

At various times, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What is the most important state to our union?

David delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Connie, Tom, Steve, and Djere:

New York. The financial and diplomatic capital of the world, and the place where millions of immigrants have entered the United States to become part of the great American melting pot. No one comes here without visiting the Empire State, whether it’s the Beatles or King Kong.

 

Josh concurs:

New York, because it contains the greatest city in the world, or so I’m told.

 

Job joins this dissent:

California — the eighth-largest economy in the world, with a world-renowned mystique dating from the 1800s.

 

MC-B, Mike, and Kaitlin played no part in the determination of this issue.

The Council’s Ruling — Top Band

02/4/2009, 12:00 pm -- by | No Comments

At various times, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — Who has been the top band of this millennium?

Tom delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Connie and David:

U2. A decades-spanning career and fronted by a man whose genuine concern for the downtrodden increases the band’s stature even more.

 

Job concurs, joined by Tom:

It’s still U2: in sales, popularity, concert attendance, and fame.

 

Djere concurs:

U2 successfully reinvented themselves and are positioned as one of the biggest draws of the ‘naughty aughties.’

 

Josh dissents, joined by Steve:

Coldplay, due to their relative newness, broad appeal, and the likelihood that they will still be making meaningful albums in ten years.

 

MC-B, Mike, and Kaitlin played no part in the determination of this issue.

Best of the Council — Santa Claus

12/17/2008, 3:30 pm -- by | No Comments

At various times, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This classic question, originally published in May 2008 — What should you tell your children about Santa Claus?

Kaitlin delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Djere, David, and Steve:

That he does not exist. He should be treated like any other fictional character.

 

David concurs, joined by Tom and Connie:

Treat him as make-believe; when your children learn the truth at some point, they may assume you made up the stuff about Jesus too.

 

Job dissents, joined by Chloe:

I will tell my kids Santa Claus exists because his essence is one of the few things most Americans have as a shared identity.

 

Erin dissents:

Go ahead and let them believe for a few years. They’ll get over the moment of truth.

 

Josh dissents:

He’s a great example of why you shouldn’t eat too many cookies, unless you want a jiggly belly.

 

MC-B and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

The Council’s Ruling — Lunch

09/22/2008, 12:30 pm -- by | 2 Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — If you could only eat one lunch for the rest of your life, what would it be?

The Council was unable to issue a majority ruling.

MCB offers this opinion, joined by Job and Connie:

A submarine sandwich with everything on it; it’s delicious and gets me my vegetables for the meal, sometimes for the day.

 

Steve offers this opinion, joined by Djere:

A simple, fresh cheeseburger with all the fixins. The best when done right.

 

Kaitlin offers this opinion:

If I could make it myself, then sauteed vegetables, chips and salsa, half a melon with yogurt in the middle, and hummus. All the delicious foods that just aren’t the same at college.

 

Tom offers this opinion:

Ham and swiss on rye. Quick, easy, delicious. Sophisticated while accessible, and interesting enough in flavor to not get old quickly.

 

David offers this opinion:

Free — for obvious reasons.

 

Josh offers this opinion:

Pizza. It’s the food I’m least likely to get tired of.

 

Erin, Chloe, and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: Is the US economy in significant trouble?

The Council’s Ruling — Private Lives of Politicians

09/15/2008, 12:30 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — How relevant is a political candidate’s private life to his or her performance in office?

The Council was unable to agree on a rationale, but gives a tentative ruling of “relevant.”

David offers this opinion, joined by Djere and Connie:

Very relevant. A person is nothing more than the sum of their actions and how they have responded to their failings — moral or otherwise.

 

Connie offers this opinion, joined by Job:

It speaks to one’s character, so I believe it is quite relevant. Important potential life-changing decisions are made based on this same character.

 

Kaitlin offers this opinion, joined by Steve and Tom:

In an ideal world, personal morality would be directly proportionate to leadership ability. In the real world, candidates’ private lives have little bearing on how well they will lead.

 

Steve offers this opinion, joined by Kaitlin and Tom:

Somewhat relevant — especially if it could be used as blackmail — but fortunately for mankind, a bad person can still make a good leader.

 

Chloe offers this opinion:

Moderately relevant — a politician’s integrity can be measured by the self-restraint in his or her private life. However, the media has used politicians’ private lives to obscure the true issues and sway voters in one direction or the other.

 

Josh dissents, joined by MCB:

If it’s the candidate from the party I oppose, personal problems are irrefutable proof that he is incapable of running the nation, since he can’t run his own life. If it’s the candidate from my party, it’s completely irrelevant; please stop persecuting the man during a difficult family time.

 

Erin and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: If you had to eat the same meal for lunch for the rest of your life, what would it be?

The Council’s Ruling — Iraq

09/8/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | 1 Comment

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — Given the benefit of hindsight, was the war in Iraq worth its cost?

The Council was unable to agree on a rationale, but gives a tentative ruling of “yes.”

David offers this opinion, joined by Djere and Connie:

Yes. Saddam was a bully who invaded two neighbors and was our sworn enemy. He continually violated UN-imposed restrictions and his war machine needed to be dismantled to give us a chance to stabilize the Middle East.

 

Tom offers this opinion, joined by David and Djere:

Can you put a price on the freedom of 28,221,181 people?

 

Steve offers this opinion, joined by Kaitlin:

It could go either way, but I lean toward yes. For all the rabid, baseless foaming of its opponents, I believe history will vindicate the war as measured, efficacious, and transformative.

 

Chloe offers this opinion, joined by Steve:

When the children of this war have grown up knowing democracy and become democratic voters, then we will know the war has been a success. If, however, they grow up angry or weak and either choose fundamentalism or choose to do nothing about fundamentalism, we will know the war has failed.

 

Kaitlin offers this opinion, joined by Josh:

We’re not at the point of hindsight yet.

 

Mike offers this opinion:

I still don’t know…

 

Erin dissents, joined by MCB:

No, it wasn’t. It has cost lives unecessarily, greatly damaged the USA’s foreign credibility, put us further billions of dollars into debt, was based on faulty information/oil lust/personal Bush family past-clearing issues…

 

Job played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: How relevant is a political candidate’s private life to his or her performance in office?

The Council’s Ruling — Portion of a Song

09/2/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | 1 Comment

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What part of a song most affects whether you will like it?

Kaitlin delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by David, Chloe, and Steve:

Sound is paramount. Music is about emotion, and the feeling that a song creates constitutes its main value.

 

Job dissents, joined by Connie and Erin:

The bridge, because it’s where a lot of artists either express or fake their talent.

 

Erin dissents, joined by Mike:

The lyrics — are they cheesy? Do they try to take themselves too seriously? Then I probably won’t like the song.

 

Tom dissents:

The melody. I’ve heard ridiculous lyrics that I’ve enjoyed listening to, and poignant ones I’ll ignore every time.

 

MCB, Josh, and Djere played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: Given the benefit of hindsight, was the war in Iraq worth its cost — and why?

The Council’s Ruling — News Source

08/25/2008, 5:00 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What is our most trusted source of news?

The Council was unable to reach a majority ruling on this issue.

Steve offers this opinion, joined by David and Job:

In a crisis, I turn to the television news networks; for all their faults, they have the resources to report the truth when it counts.

 

Kaitlin offers this opinion, joined by Tom:

I try to seek out media which support views opposite to mine. That way, I know that the good news I hear is more likely to be true, since it does nothing to help the biased sources’ cause.

 

Chloe offers this opinion, joined by Erin:

I prefer to listen to the same news story a few times from various sources in order to find the information being repeated. I trust those bits the most. Also, The Onion.

 

Connie offers this opinion:

Instant crawlers from Fox or CNN. Before they have a chance to spin it too much. I check the newspapers later for details and updates.

 

Djere offers this opinion:

Vinnie, the shady guy who hangs out down by the dog track. He always picks the winner.

 

Tom offers this opinion:

Town Crier. Narrow in scope, but close to the source.

 

Erin offers this opinion:

What I see with my own eyes. In the words of Frank Herbert: don’t count a man dead until you’ve seen his body. And even then, you can make a mistake.

 

Josh offers this opinion:

If it’s on the Internet, it has to be true.

 

MC-B and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: What part of a song most affects whether you will like it?

The Council’s Ruling — Hardest Job

08/18/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | 2 Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What is the most difficult job?

Job delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Steve, David, Connie, and Chloe:

The Presidency — relatively low pay, no privacy, a professional ceiling, few contemporaries, and, in the end, 10% of them are assassinated.

 

MC-B concurs, joined by Steve:

President of the United States. The whole world’s eyes are upon you, and just a few missteps can mean Armageddon.

 

Kaitlin dissents, joined by Erin:

Childcare. Taking the place of a parent, even for a short time, is incredibly difficult, and the compensation is never adequate.

 

Djere dissents, joined by Tom:

Defense attorney at The Hague. Defending war criminals has got to be dirty, nasty, thirsty work.

 

Josh and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: What is the most trustworthy source of news?

The Council’s Ruling — Most Overrated Author

08/11/2008, 8:00 pm -- by | 4 Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — Who is the most overrated author?

The Council was unable to reach a majority ruling on this issue, although there may be a plurality supporting Stephen King.

Tom offers this opinion, joined by Kaitlin and Job:

William Shakespeare. Cleverly explore a few themes universal to the human experience and all the sudden you’re “The Bard?” Puh-lease.

 

Steve offers this opinion, joined by Connie and Djere:

J.K. Rowling. Her reputation and her net worth far exceed the (average) level of her work.

 

MC-B offers this opinion, joined by Tom:

Stephen King; I get it, the guy writes scary novels. Anything else?

 

Connie offers this opinion, joined by MC-B:

Stephen King — he preys on the cheap thrills that come from dabbling in the occult. There are places he goes that he shouldn’t, and stupid people follow who also shouldn’t.

 

Erin offers this opinion, joined by David:

Either Stephen King or the LaHaye/Jenkins duo. King is just too morbid, and the others needed to be shut up during their first book.

 

Djere offers this opinion, joined by Mike:

Mitch Albom — I’d rather spend Tuesdays with morons than his book.

 

Chloe offers this opinion:

Muhammad — he wrote, at times, pure nonsense, which even some Qur’an scholars will confess.

 

Josh played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: What is the most difficult job?

The Council’s Ruling — The Election

08/4/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — Which candidate (if any) will you support for President?

Bweinh.com hereby endorses John McCain.

Steve delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Kaitlin, Tom, Djere, and Connie:

The makeup of the Supreme Court alone would compel me to support John McCain, who is drastically better qualified to be President than his opponent.

 

Mike concurs, joined by Steve:

John McCain–because the audacity of hope shouldn’t stop at the birth canal.

 

Chloe concurs:

McCain — he’s so hot in his uniform.

 

David concurs:

McCain — the lesser of two evils.

 

MC-B dissents, joined by Erin:

I will not support either with anything other than my vote, and each has yet to win me completely to his camp.

 

Josh and Job played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: Who is the most overrated author of all time?

The Council’s Ruling — Punctuation

07/28/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What is the most underappreciated punctuation mark?

Steve delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Chloe, Kaitlin, Tom, and MC-B:

It must be the semicolon — like man, an elegant unifier of seemingly disparate thoughts.

 

MC-B concurs, joined by Mike:

The semicolon: though underused, it has the power to bind two otherwise unrelated sentences together.

 

Djere dissents, joined by Connie and David:

The sarcostrophe. So many brainless people on the internet can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic. The sarcostrophe clears *ALL* that up.

 

Erin, Josh, and Job played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: Which candidate (if any) will you support for President?

The Council’s Ruling — Gas Prices

07/21/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — At what price did (or will) gasoline become “too expensive”?

Tom delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Chloe, David, Steve, and MC-B:

Until a reasonable alternative is developed, gasoline will never be “too expensive.”

 

Erin concurs, joined by MC-B:

It became (or will become) too expensive when we resign ourselves to it being expensive and refuse to explore alternate fuel options.

 

Kaitlin dissents, joined by Connie:

$3.00. That’s when I stopped rooting for the total to add up quickly so that I didn’t have to stand there filling up any longer.

 

Josh dissents, joined by Kaitlin:

$2.85 seems cheap now, but it was the first hike that made me drive less, and pine for the days not too long before when it was less than half the price.

 

Connie dissents, joined by Djere:

$4.00 is ridiculous! Somebody do something!!!

 

Job and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: What is the most underappreciated punctuation mark?

The Council’s Ruling — Greatest Wonder of the World

07/14/2008, 12:00 pm -- by | No Comments

This and every Monday, the Bweinh!tributors, having convened in secret for hours of reasoned debate and consideration, will issue a brief and binding ruling on an issue of great societal import.

This week’s question — What is the greatest wonder of the world?

Steve delivers the ruling of the Council, joined by Kaitlin, David, and MC-B:

A network of computers and people with the potential to instantly connect anyone anywhere on the planet: the Internet.

 

Tom dissents, joined by Djere:

The Colossus of Rhodes. A statue big enough to stand astride a harbor? Sign me up.

 

Djere dissents, joined by Erin:

Machu Picchu — a site with an amazing history, amazing infrastructure, amazing architecture… amazing everything. And it was all created without the wheel!

 

Josh dissents:

The Pyramids. I just can’t fathom how they got there.

 

Chloe dissents:

Bweinh! Because it combines a whole bunch of great stuff with greater people and it’s really great.

 

Connie dissents:

Babies. The more I learn about them, the more I am in awe of God’s design.

 

Job and Mike played no part in the determination of this issue.

Next time: At what price did (or will) gasoline become “too expensive”?

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