Ask Bweinh! Poll — Colors (#2)

01/21/2008, 10:00 am -- by | No Comments

Today’s poll is a repeat performance — we first considered the question ten months ago, right here! And the champ holds onto its title.

Rank Color Points
1. Blue 25
2. Green 21
3. Orange 15
4. Red 11
5. Black 9
6. Brown 7
7-8 (tie) Lime Green; Olive 5
9-11 (tie) Silver; Burgundy; Yellow 4
Other Cyan; Magenta; White; Mauve; Cobalt Blue 1-3


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Most Admired People

01/14/2008, 10:15 am -- by | 2 Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by OxiClean: now specially formulated to clean your . . . baby?!?

Rank Person Points
1. George W. Bush 11
2. Ronald Reagan 9
3-4 (tie) Job Tate; Tom Selleck 8
5. Billy Graham 7
6-10 (tie) Mother Teresa; Josh Jones (2018); Richard Dean Anderson; Rich Mullins; St. Francis of Assisi 5
Other Robin Roberts; AC Green; Peter Furler; JMW Turner; TS Eliot; Derek Webb; Omarosa; Glenn Beck; Charles Stanley; Matt Redman; Danny Wegman; Justin Guarini; Bill Cosby; Bart Simpson; Billy Mays; L. Ron Hubbard; Elizabeth Edwards; Tom Cruise; Bigfoot; O. Henry (candy bar) 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — 2008 Candidates (#4)

01/7/2008, 5:00 pm -- by | 11 Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by C-Span, which has asked us to remind you that today at 1 pm, they will be airing a riveting speech by Nancy A. Nord, acting chairman of the Consumer Product Safety Commission, on “major product safety challenges.”

C-Span! Feel the power!

Four months after our last poll and one day before the New Hampshire primary, we return to the question of our next leader!

Rank Candidate Points Previous
1. Fred Thompson 26 (2) 1, 7, NR
2. John McCain 26 (1) 5, Other
3. Mike Huckabee 24 4, 4, 6
4. Mitt Romney 23 3, 1, 1
5. Alan Keyes 13 NR
6. Rudolph Giuliani 11 NR
7. Barack Obama 9 Other, 5, Other
8-9 (tie) Dennis Kucinich; John Edwards 5 NR; 6, NR, 7
10. Duncan Hunter 4 Other, 10, NR
Other Hillary Clinton; Bill Richardson 1, 3 NR

Ask Bweinh! Poll — Christmas Carols

12/20/2007, 9:00 pm -- by | 2 Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by Ludwig van Beethoven — the greatest musician in history.

He owned Mozart.

Rank Carol Points
1. O Holy Night 20
2. Carol of the Bells 15
3. Silent Night 13
4-5 (tie) O Come, O Come Emmanuel; Angels We Have Heard on High 10
6-7 (tie) What Child Is This?; O Come All Ye Faithful 9
8. In the Bleak Midwinter 7
9. The First Noel 6
10-13 (tie) Joy to the World; God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen; O Little Town of Bethlehem; Hark, The Herald Angels Sing 5
Other I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day; Mary, Did You Know?; The Angel Gabriel; Ding, Dong, Merrily On High; Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer 2-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Christmas Characters

12/17/2007, 10:15 am -- by | 1 Comment

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is again sponsored by Air Transat — the worst airline in the world!

As one representative customer wrote: “Unless you have no funds to travel with a half-decent airline, don’t choose this company. . . if you have to fly with them, eat decently prior to embarkation as their food is terrible, and ensure you have sufficient materials to keep yourself amused as there is precious little in the way of inflight entertainment.”

Air Transat! The masochist’s choice!

The Christmas narrative presents several memorable characters — here are our favorites, other than baby Jesus!

Rank Character Points
1. Joseph 27
2. The shepherds 24
3. Mary 17
4. The Magi 14
5. The innkeeper 11
6. Elizabeth 8
7-8 (tie) The heavenly host; Frank N. Scents 5
9. Joe the Sheep 4
10-11 (tie) Simeon; Elsie the Cow 3
Other Zacharias; Ricky “White Shoes” Garibaldi (the innkeeper); Animals; Donkey; Harold Angel; Sheep; The Narrator; Rudolph the Red-Nosed Shepherd 1-2

Ask Bweinh! Poll — The Twelve Days

12/13/2007, 10:15 am -- by | No Comments

Which of the famous gifts in the ‘Twelve Days of Christmas’ song would we like to receive?

Rank Gift Points
1. 5 golden rings 35
2. 6 geese-a-laying 19
3-4 (tie) 3 French hens; 9 ladies dancing 16
5. 10 lords-a-leaping 14
6. 11 pipers piping 9
7. 8 maids-a-milking 7
8. 4 calling birds 6
9. 12 drummers drumming 5
10. 2 turtle doves 4
Other 7 swans-a-swimming; a partridge in a pear tree 2

Ask Bweinh! Poll — Christmas Highlights

12/10/2007, 9:45 am -- by | 1 Comment

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll (now presented in Spanish — just hit the ‘SAP button’ on your remote!) asks for the Bweinh!tributors’ favorite parts of the Christmas season.

Rank Highlight Points
1. People/Family 29
2. Decorations/Mistletoe/Tree 14
3. Snow/Cold Weather 12
4-5 (tie) Cookies; Vacation 11
6. Carols 10
7. Dinner 6
8-10 (tie) “The end”; Candlelight Service; The Wumpus 5
Other Wood smoke; Generosity; Presents; Movies; Shopping; Chex Mix; Regifting; “Annual Nativity Scene Lawsuits”; Elves; Egg Nog; Festivus 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Hardest Jobs

12/7/2007, 11:45 am -- by | No Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll — sponsored by Wendy’s: have it your way!

Rank Job Points
1. Miner 18
2. Crab Fisherman 11
3. Policeman 9
4. Prison Guard 7
5-8 (tie) Middle School Teacher; Missionary; Overnight Stockboy; Lumberjill 5
9-11 (tie) Househusband; Farmer; Child Care 4
Other Soldier; Retail; Oncologist; President; Fast Food; EMT; Sweatshop; Septic System Cleaner; Divorce Mediator; Nurse; Janitor; Mathematician; WalMart Greeter; Starving Artist; School Bus Driver; Miami Dolphin; Telemarketer 1-3


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Easiest Jobs

12/3/2007, 5:30 pm -- by | No Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by whichever ridiculously incompetent company is responsible for me STILL not having Internet access in my apartment. I cannot wait to identify them by name.

Rank Job Points
1. Food Taster 12
2. Gym Teacher 9
3-4 (tie) Pro Golfer; Wine Taster/Sommelier 6
5-11 (tie) Church Secretary; Voice Actor; Mattress Tester; Preschool Teacher; Gofer; Receptionist; Video Game Tester 5
Other Paperboy; Sidekick; Security Guard; Actor; Librarian; Child Care Worker; Hospital Pharmacist; Pizza Deliveryman; Front Desk at Dorm; Politician; Mall Kiosk; Bank President; CEO; Google Employee; Salesman; Manicurist; Truck Driver; Mystery Shopper; Professor 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Bible Characters

11/26/2007, 9:30 am -- by | No Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by Air Transat: the worst airline in the world!! Just listen to what one more satisfied customer said:

“I would not fly Air Transat unless it was the only way to get somewhere . . . customer service certainly doesn’t seem like a priority. Space is cramped. Leg room is non-existent. If there were a class called “sub-economy,” I would classify Air Transat in that category.”

Air Transat! Terrible!

For the second time, Bweinh! addresses our favorite Bible characters — other than Jesus Himself.

Rank Character Points
1. Paul 17
2. Abraham 9
3-4 (tie) Peter; Maher-shalal-hash-baz 7
5. Moses 6
6-8 (tie) Moses; Jael; Rufus’ mother 5
9-17 (tie) Lydia; Isaac; Samson; Jonathan; Job; Eve; Ehud; David; “the abomination that causes desolation” 4
Other Nehemiah; Jacob; Elijah; Lot’s wife; Darius; Josiah; Timothy; Samuel; John; John the Baptist; Esther; Apollos; Zechariah; Joshua; Reuben; Deborah; Jeroboam; Nathan 1-3


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Beverages

11/20/2007, 10:30 am -- by | 1 Comment

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll is brought to you by the vermiform appendix, a blind-ended tube and ticking time bomb, usually connected to your cecum.

For the second time, we present a list of favorite beverages — and this time, there’s a new king!

Rank Beverage Points
1. Ice Water 22
2. Coffee 20
3. Orange Juice 14
4. Earl Grey Tea 9
5. Orangina 7
6. Coke 6
7-8 (tie) Milk; Orange Kool-Aid 5
9-12 (tie) Root Beer; Strawberry Milk; Hot Chocolate; San Pellegrino Limonata 4
Other Iced Tea; Diet Pepsi; Chai; Starbucks Chantico; Milkshake; Pineapple Juice; Apple Juice; Cola; Adirondack Citrus Frost; Pepsi; Coffee Milk; Black Currant/Raspberry Soda; Apple Cider; Rainwater; “the blood of my enemies” 1-3


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Musicians

11/15/2007, 10:30 am -- by | 1 Comment

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll, brought to you by the emotion of relief! Ask for it by name.

Rank Musician Points
1. Phil Keaggy 10
2. Bela Fleck 9
3-5 (tie) Yo Yo Ma; Josh Groban; Rich Mullins 7
6-7 (tie) Maxon; Ben Gibbard 6
8-13(tie) Benny Goodman; Eric Clapton; Phil Sweet; Fernando Ortega; Bond; Keith Green 5
Other Ben Folds; Lyle Lovett; Vanessa Mae; Victor Wooten; Bruce Springsteen; Miles Davis; Mary Chapin Carpenter; Carlos Santana; Derek Webb; Michael Card; Ray Charles; Ryan Clark; Chico Marx; Myron Lefevre; Chanticleer; Mozart; “that young famous violinist” 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Foreign Languages

11/12/2007, 10:00 am -- by | No Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll, brought to you by Air Transat: the worst airline in the world! As one satisfied customer put it — “Air Transat, for me, is low-quality, dangerous, cheap (in other ways than money), and their staff are saddening, rude, and careless.”

Air Transat! Saddening, rude and careless!

Rank Language Points
1. Spanish 40
2. French 19
3. Italian 15
4. German 13
5. Russian 7
6. Greek 6
7-10 (tie) Pig Latin; Mandarin Chinese; Latin; Esperanto 5
Other Scots Gaelic; Irish Gaelic; Hebrew; Arabic; Portuguese; Korean; Klingon; Latin; Canadian; Xhosa; Clicking; Albanian 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Prepositions

11/8/2007, 11:30 am -- by | 1 Comment

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll, brought to you by the loud guy outside my door who won’t stop laughing!


One of the most wonderful parts of our language is the preposition. And these are the best of the best!

Rank Preposition Points
1. Among 15
2. With 13
3. In 11
4-6 (tie) Over; At; Beyond 9
7. For 8
8-14 (tie) Beneath; Across; Around; On; Through; Athwart; Under 5
Other Without; Aboard; Above; Toward; Into; About; Against; Except; From; By; To; Betwixt; Via 1-4


Ask Bweinh! Poll — Annoying Instruments

11/5/2007, 10:00 am -- by | No Comments

Today’s Ask Bweinh! poll, brought to you by freethinking martyr Michael Servetus, of whom John Calvin wrote, “I am unwilling to pledge my word for his safety, for if he shall come, I shall never permit him to depart alive, provided my authority be of any avail.”

Mmmm, total depravity!

Which instruments are the most annoying? Here’s our list!

Rank Instrument Points
1. Accordion 21
2. Recorder 14
3. Autoharp 10
4-5 (tie) (E-flat) Clarinet; Tambourine 7
6-8 (tie) Spoons; Penny Whistle; Synthesizer 6
9-14 (tie) Bass Drum; Bagpipes; Harmonica; Bad Singer; Kazoo; Ukulele 5
Other (Marching) French Horn; Finger Cymbals; Armpit; Oboe; Tuba; Fisher-Price Keyboard; Violin; Triangle; Slide Whistle; Piccolo; Organ; Electric Keyboard; Saw; Bass Flute; Flute; Calliope; Turntable; Microphone; Mouth Harp 1-4

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