At the Movies

September 25, 2007, 11:00 am; posted by
Filed under Articles, Humor, Job  | 1 Comment

Best of Job, May 2006

in the theatre


across from me
3 guys
2 girls
they sit: guy girl guy girl guy

i enjoy mission: impossible 3
generally speaking
i am brave
and admit
i usually enjoy tom cruise movies
speaking generally
but i take long draw from straw
lull in movie

i try
to find out
which of the guys is the loser
as if the soda will supply the answer

which guy is the loser
which guy is the fifth wheel

my straw begins to suck air
movie picks up speed again
but i know


it is guy girl guy girl guy


movie reaches fevered pitch
hollywood flexes its muscles

should i go get free refill?
will i miss anything good?
better not
many important plot twists
cruise might inexplicably start running again
wouldn’t want to miss that
and i’m there alone
no one to brief me with synopsis upon return

then it dawns on me
despite explosions, theatre quiet

it is me

i am loser


chair chair chair guy chair


1 Comment to “At the Movies”

  1. Steve on September 25th, 2007 11:04 am

    Almost every time I go back and pick a ‘best of Job’ article, I think, “This might be my favorite thing he’s ever written.”

    But this one?

    This one might actually be it.

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