At the Movies
Best of Job, May 2006
in the theatre
across from me
3 guys
2 girls
they sit: guy girl guy girl guy
i enjoy mission: impossible 3
generally speaking
i am brave
and admit
i usually enjoy tom cruise movies
speaking generally
but i take long draw from straw
lull in movie
i try
to find out
which of the guys is the loser
as if the soda will supply the answer
which guy is the loser
which guy is the fifth wheel
my straw begins to suck air
movie picks up speed again
but i know
it is guy girl guy girl guy
movie reaches fevered pitch
hollywood flexes its muscles
should i go get free refill?
will i miss anything good?
better not
many important plot twists
cruise might inexplicably start running again
wouldn’t want to miss that
and i’m there alone
no one to brief me with synopsis upon return
then it dawns on me
despite explosions, theatre quiet
it is me
i am loser
chair chair chair guy chair
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Almost every time I go back and pick a ‘best of Job’ article, I think, “This might be my favorite thing he’s ever written.”
But this one?
This one might actually be it.