Joke of the Day, 7/7/08

07/7/2008, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car in a cloud of feathers.

Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse and rang the doorbell. A farmer appeared. The man nervously said, “I think I killed your rooster — may I replace him?”

“Suit yourself,” the farmer replied. “The henhouse is around back.”

Bweinh! Goes to the Movies: Hancock

07/3/2008, 5:38 pm -- by Connie | 2 Comments

I went on a spontaneous date night the other evening to see Wanted, but ended up in an unexpected early showing of Hancock. We’ve all seen the trailers for the reluctant drunken superhero played by Will Smith, and it looked good — so since my movie required waiting an additional hour and had Jolie in it, we opted for Hancock. But I have to say, I kind of wish we had waited for James McAvoy.

July 4 has belonged to Will Smith for years, with his big budget blockbusters that rake in millions (like Independence Day and the Men In Black series), so I didn’t expect this to be any different. But here, Will plays a severely depressed alcoholic superhero, desperately in need of an intervention. Enter Jason Bateman, a small-time PR guy, trying to save the world by doing his part, but not making much headway. Their meeting is one of the highlights of the movie. Jason brings him home for dinner with his wife (Charlize Theron) to show his gratitude, and we’re off.

I like the premise behind Hancock’s powers. For once the writers used imagination, rather than taking the easy path of making him an alien. Thanks for doing a little work. I love the comedic relief Will provides: sometimes you see it coming, other times you just sit back and enjoy the ride. In this movie, you know the bad guys will get their just reward if they don’t listen to him — they make the choice whether to listen.

One of my favorite parts was when he was presented with his new superhero uniform. You don’t actually get to see what it is he says he’ll never wear; you just get to imagine it for a while. I also liked the chemistry between the top three stars. It’s effortless and believable as they transition from strangers to friends. But I think Will could work with a room full of machines or robots and still pull it off. Oh wait — he already did…

But there was more that I didn’t like. The movie was too dark and fragmented. I didn’t like all the cursing (especially by young children) and the violence was outrageous, especially toward the end. I spent a fair amount of time cringing at the noise and sheer brutality of some of the scenes. I have a hard time calling this sort of thing entertainment. It even drained some of my desire to see Wanted, because I’ve heard it’s similarly violent — and Jolie’s in it. Yuck.

But back to Hancock — even though my husband loved it, I must be true to myself and give it only an EINH (B-/C+) on our BWEINH! scale. I’m still down wit’ Will (I’ll see you next July, man), but this film just did not deliver the goods.

Next stay tuned for Wanted, with my main man James McAvoy!

Quote of the Day, 7/3/08

07/3/2008, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

Battle of the Bands LXI: Special Edition

07/3/2008, 1:05 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

Here is the next batch of band names from Esther — and the Luke finals!

Kings of Babylon and Seven Eunuchs move on!

{democracy:275}

{democracy:276}

Bible Discussion: Esther 3-5

07/2/2008, 12:00 pm -- by Bweinh | No Comments

This week, Bweinh.com continues in Esther by discussing the next three chapters!

PREVIOUS DISCUSSIONS:
Genesis: 1-4 | 5-9 | 10-14 | 15-18 | 19-22 | 23-26
27-29 | 30-32 | 33-36 | 37-39 | 40-43 | 44-46 | 47-50
Exodus: 1-4 | 5-8 | 9-11 | 12-14 | 15-18
19-22 | 23-26 | 27-30 | 31-34 | 35-40
Romans: Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 (I)
Ch. 8 (II) | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10 | Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 | Ch. 13 | Ch. 14 | Ch. 15-16
Luke: 1:1-38 | 1:39-2:40 | 2:41-3:38 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
11 | 12 | 13 | 14-15 | 16-17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24
Esther: 1-2

INTRODUCTION:
David:
The scene is now set for the clash between God\’s people and the reigning world power. All we need to set it off is an arrogant prime minister and an uncompromising man of God.

Connie:
The newlyweds begin their happily-ever-after — but wait, there\’s an evil ambitious madman threatening to wreck their future! Why hasn\’t Disney gotten to this yet?

SOMETHING YOU’D NEVER NOTICED BEFORE:
David:
I just noticed, or perhaps re-noticed, that Mordecai\’s refusal to bow to Haman leads to the decree to kill all the Jews. The Bible says the upright contend with the wicked just by keeping the Law; this is the proof.

Connie:
I guess that Mordecai sort of caused all the trouble in the first place by telling his friends at the gate that he was Jewish — after swearing Esther to secrecy. He\’d already told everyone she was his daughter, so whether he told or she told, either way, the cat was out of the bag.

Chloe:
3:15 says that the city of Susa was bewildered, but it doesn\’t say why.

BEST BAND NAME FROM THE PASSAGE:
David: Nisan
Connie: Haman’s Conspiracy
Steve: Hammedatha

Continued here!

The Wardrobe of a Homeless Man (Part One)

07/2/2008, 10:30 am -- by Chloe | No Comments

They say people have layers, that each layer gives you a little insight into a person\’s life. Most people hide their layers, though, so you won\’t see who they really are, what they care about, why they\’re here. Most people go their whole lives without anyone seeing all their layers. They die as undiscovered people.

Almost everyone in New York City wears one layer: the executive accountant, senior partner, musician. They scream their success with cell phones and hair dos and million-dollar purses. The lawyers live in Armani, the musicians in black, and the artists under crooked berets. That is the only layer you see. Most people don\’t show underwear or bare skin. They don\’t want you to know about that part of them.

George chose to be different the day he walked away from his childhood. He was 15. Since then, he\’s learned a lot of things — about the world, about the people, about himself — and he\’s learned that the best way to wear the truth is out where everyone can see it. Shock ”˜em. It\’s the only way to go.

He wears his thinnest layer nearest to his heart: a wife-beater that used to be white but somewhere along the way turned yellow, and boxers with little stars and moth holes all over it. They are always there, by him, but in the summer is the only time he shows them off to the world. He lets them know, “This is what I left home with, and I still have it.” Then he asks, “What do you have?” This is the layer he keeps nearest to his heart, with the things most important to him held close.

His second layer is for those warm summer days: an old pine green T-shirt that used to smell like a woman\’s perfume. There\’s a lipstick stain on the ragged collar from the only girl he ever loved. It\’s faded, but it\’s still there. On the shoulder seam, there\’s a long tear from when they parted ways. The cops were pulling them apart and she was holding onto his sleeve and it ripped. Now on summer days when the world seems to have reached the edge of perfection, he sees his sleeve and he remembers there\’s no such thing as perfection. He keeps hatred and love right above his home.

Continued here!

Joke of the Day, 7/2/08

07/2/2008, 7:00 am -- by Bweinh | No Comments

What did the Mexican firefighter name his sons?

JosÃ© and Hose B!

One Hundred Words (22)

07/2/2008, 2:00 am -- by Chloe | 1 Comment

I fall in love with every car I drive.

The first was a huge silver Dodge with a diesel engine and a roar that herded cows more than once.

The second was a little red Toyota stick shift. I loved to hear the (shift) VROOM (shift) VROOM that made me feel like a drag racer. (The very day I named it Macbeth, it blew a head gasket and soundly died.)

Now I\’m driving a Ram Charger with gargantuan wheels and fantastic speakers. I lean back with one arm out the window, music blasting, and feel a little bit awesome.

–CLA

Clash of the Titans LXXXV: Where to Park?

07/1/2008, 12:00 pm -- by Bweinh | No Comments

In this corner, parking close by, is Connie!

And in this corner, parking far away, is MC-B!

I’m writing the no-brainer side of this Clash — parking near. I have no idea why someone would choose to park far away ON PURPOSE, but defend my choice I must, so here we go:

Time: My time is at a premium and I must protect it at all cost. I simply cannot afford to park rows away when a spot is available closer. Plus, with the time I\’ve saved, I will be more prepared for my appointment. I will be seated sooner, remembering points or questions I plan to raise or cover. And I will not be sweaty, or worse: late, from walking long distances across foreign parking wastelands.

I might also spend my extra time planning something like, perhaps, dinner, thereby avoiding mistakes like serving pine nuts to someone with an allergy who may be eating with us that night. Haste causes many problems.

Efficiency: Having my vehicle nearby lets me keep my eye on it, in case of Tomfoolery. One never knows when one might be the subject of a prank, or worse yet, a felony! But being close by and ever diligent, I can either prevent the damage, or at least give a good description of the miscreant(s) involved.

Or, if I\’ve forgotten something in my vehicle, a few quick steps back to retrieve a photo or lab test won\’t hold up my friend/doctor. Oh, let\’s just face it, most of my doctors are my friends! And they all want to see pictures of Tom!

Attitude: When I find a spot near to where I need to be, I feel blessed (some others would say lucky, but I know better). This gives me a calm, happy, peaceful spirit as I enter my appointment or errand. This might lend itself to a more positive interaction later in my appointment. Never underestimate that.

I pray before I go somewhere, and (almost) always God provides a spot for me. In return, I try not to waste the wonderful time He has given me here. Someone asked if we should waste His time asking for parking spots, and I say if He gives them, how is it wasteful? He blesses our time when we give it to Him.

First of all, I\’m not going to suggest that I would surrender a close spot to look for one farther away from a store; instead, I argue only that hunting for spots close to a store is not a very good use of time or other resources. Of course, whether or not a person prefers to park close to their destination is generally dependent on their station in life and how they experience shopping and other errands. As a youngish man, I simply cannot see a reason to drive around the parking lot looking for a good space and wasting time when I could park at a moderate, or even far distance, and get there almost as quickly.

Additionally, there are a number of benefits to parking far. Exercise is probably the most obvious; while a small minority of people need to park close to ensure that they can transport their purchases back to their vehicle, it is undeniable that Americans as a whole could use more exercise, and that the vast majority could benefit from fitting small exercises into their day — taking the stairs, riding a bike, or parking a little farther from their destinations and carrying what they buy a little bit longer.

Fuel savings are another small benefit of parking farther away, due less to the small extra distance that one drives to the storefront than to the incessant circling that often results from trying to find that one good spot. Admittedly, this is a very small savings, but they do add up over time.

Parking far away, as long as there are still a few other cars near yours, is also a good way to avoid the hazards more often found at the front of the parking lot close to the store: most notably shopping carts, but also small children and other circling cars. As a result, it often allows you to leave more readily when you want to go.

Finally, someone else may need a closer spot far more than I do. Again, as a young man, it\’s not particularly important for me to get a close spot, but someone older or injured may need it. I’m sure it rarely works out this way, but certainly more often than it would if I actively sought out better spaces. For all of these reasons, going out of one’s way to park close to a storefront generally isn\’t worth the effort.

{democracy:274}