Best of Bweinh! — Married/Single Clash

11/21/2008, 11:00 am -- by Bweinh | 1 Comment

In this corner, defending the sanctity of marriage, is Tom!

And in this corner, loving the freedom of the single life, is Djere!

Married life is the best kind of life there is. Trading freedom for security has always been the way we roll here in the U.S. of A! So many rough areas of a man’s life can be smoothed out by the delicate touch of a feminine hand.

Decision-making is a prime example. Making decisions is a lot of work. Where to live, what job to take, what to wear? Who has time to figure out the proper choice in all of these important areas? Most single men learn to make decisions quickly, weighing options and coming to decisions so fast that the process seems almost primitive in its simplicity.

The married man can still quickly reach a simple decision, but it is never the end result. Instead, it’s just one stop on the interminable amusement park ride central to any marriage: the discussion. By looping around and around the many possible choices, a man with a skilled spouse eventually comes to see the ignorance of his original choice, and the unparalleled superiority of the course his wife has already selected. Eventually these “discussions” can strip a man of his desire to make an initial choice, streamlining the entire process!

Marriage also lets a man grow beyond the boundaries he places on his social life. Many single men prefer the company of a particular group of friends, spending the majority of social time with them, coming to know them well. Once a man is married, these constraints are taken from him, and he can come to full social fruition. New friends he would not have chosen! New activities he does not enjoy! An entire new family with whom to spend holidays, reunions, excruciatingly boring conversations, and arguments!

And chores! Once a man has a wife, he has a partner with whom to split the domestic tasks central to any household. A single man has no assistance in performing these chores, and no helper to decide when they should be done. It’s true that marriage brings a man a tidier house, but with a spouse helping, the net decrease in work will be offset by the extra discussions that will fill the saved time, in lieu of radio, television, or blessed quiet.

It’s true that some freedom is lost. If I were married, I couldn’t keep the random and flexible work schedule I enjoy. I wouldn’t be able to spend my leisure time any way I like, I wouldn’t have as much time for quiet reading, I might not amuse myself so much with the Internet dot com. I certainly wouldn’t be able to drop everything and take a trip, change my plans at the last minute, or do any of the other things that make me the man I am.

No, I would become a different man, a better man, with a thousand chips of my very nature shaved away by the delicate chisel in my wife’s knowledgeable hand.

I only hope that man will think of the old me fondly from time to time, as he lives his life to the beat of his life’s new drummerette.

If he can find the time between discussions.

You know, when you’ve been married as long as I have (almost three weeks!), you almost forget what it was like on the other side…

Being single has its advantages. Gas mileage, for example. With only one person in the car, you’ll use less gas, you know, when you drive places… alone. And you’ll never have to worry about another person changing your radio stations. In fact, you never have to be exposed to any tastes other than your own! Gosh, that does sound pretty good… cruising down the highway of life — alone — listening to the same old songs on the radio…

And there are benefits outside your motor vehicle as well. Like at work! Now that I’m married, Karen calls me at work once or twice a day. But if I were single, think about how great it would be: eight uninterrupted hours without hearing a friendly voice on the other end of the telephone line. Even better — eight uninterrupted hours without hearing the person I care about more than any other say, “I love you.”

Yep, being single sure has advantages. I mean, at home you’ll never have to worry about someone messing up your stuff, the kitchen, unmaking the bed, or leaving the toilet seat in your least favorite position… because there’s never anyone there. In fact, when you’re single, you have the immense joy of doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, and chores yourself. All by yourself. Sure, you can daydream all you want that the next time you’re at the laundromat, there’ll be a pretty, single girl there who shares your joy of separating whites from darks for a bleach load, or your cultivated taste in fabric softener… but probably not.

And who does this ‘God’ fellow think He is? “It is not good for man to be alone.” What’s that all about? Certainly people weren’t designed with a helper in mind, a divinely inspired counterpart, like that “Bible” of yours says in Genesis 2:18.

When you’re single, you’ll experience neither the joy nor the pain that having a spouse brings. You don’t understand what Solomon means when he writes, “you have ravished my heart with one look of your eyes.” Just the numb comfort of loneliness and hope deferred.

Man, those were the days!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a loving wife to attend to. Cheers.

Which side are you on?

Bible Discussion — Acts 25-26

11/19/2008, 2:30 pm -- by Bweinh | No Comments

This week, Bweinh.com moves on to the next two chapters of Acts.

PREVIOUS DISCUSSIONS:
Genesis: 1-4 | 5-9 | 10-14 | 15-18 | 19-22 | 23-26
27-29 | 30-32 | 33-36 | 37-39 | 40-43 | 44-46 | 47-50
Exodus: 1-4 | 5-8 | 9-11 | 12-14 | 15-18
19-22 | 23-26 | 27-30 | 31-34 | 35-40
Romans: Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 (I)
Ch. 8 (II) | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10 | Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 | Ch. 13 | Ch. 14 | Ch. 15-16
Luke: 1:1-38 | 1:39-2:40 | 2:41-3:38 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
11 | 12 | 13 | 14-15 | 16-17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24
Esther: 1-2 | 3-5 | 6-8 | 9-10
Acts: 1 | 2 | 3-4 | 5 | 6-7 | 8 | 9-10 | 11-12
13-14 | 15-16 | 17-18 | 19-20 | 21-22 | 23-24

INTRODUCTION:
Connie:
Paul, still in chains, once again meets with Festus and is offered the deal of going back to Jerusalem to defend himself. He declines and appeals to Caesar, removing the burden of the decision from Festus. But before he heads for Rome, another king visits and asks for an audience.

SOMETHING YOU’D NEVER NOTICED BEFORE:
Josh:
During this retelling of Paul’s testimony, he included the words from the Lord, “It is hard for you to kick against the goads.” Perhaps it had not been until then that Paul fully understood how hard it was, what the price would be for that persecution.

Connie:
Festus was concerned about how King Agrippa may have been perceiving Paul’s story, and tried to cut it off by calling Paul crazy. Agrippa responds with the famous “You almost had me at ‘hello’” line, later immortalized in Jerry Maguire.

Djere:
The trial before Agrippa and Bernice was a big show, in an arena filled with “prominent men of the city.” Weird.

BEST BAND NAME FROM THE PASSAGE:
Josh: The Learned and Mad
Connie: Conversion
Djere: Uncle Festus
Steve: Oh Felix

Continued here!

From the Phone 6

11/5/2008, 1:02 am -- by Djere | No Comments

Overheard at work today:

“If this election goes the wrong way, we should move to Canada.”

“If this election goes the wrong way, we’ll BECOME Canada!”

Presidential Haiku Prediction 2

11/3/2008, 2:04 pm -- by Djere | 1 Comment

Lawsuits like raindrops
Lawyers: Biblical locusts
Apocalypse soon

Four More Years…

10/22/2008, 11:58 pm -- by Djere | No Comments

Of Jimmy Carter.

One Hundred Words (36)

10/3/2008, 3:19 pm -- by Djere | 2 Comments

I hate 24/7 news coverage of anything.

There’s nothing new to say.

Nobody listens when they say it.

It doesn’t make any sort of difference whatsoever.

All I know is that today the House passed legislation that will allow the government to further interfere in a credit market the government screwed up to begin with!

And after passing said legislation, the Democratic House leadership went on to publicly suckle the teats of Barack Obama.

Barack Obama couldn’t find his backside with both hands and a Tom Tom. Obama has absolutely no qualifications to be President, and he knows it.

–JJM

Live-Blogging the VP Debate!

10/2/2008, 7:34 pm -- by Steve | No Comments

Join us right here at 9:00 EDT for as-it-happens discussion of the vice-presidential debate!

Previous live blogs: Westboro Baptist Church

One Hundred Words (35)

09/30/2008, 1:55 pm -- by Djere | No Comments

With the financial meltdown and $700B ridiculousness eating up the media’s “Foam at the mouth about how wonderful Obama is” time, illegal immigrants aren’t in the forefront of our collective psyche.

Illegals “do the jobs Americans won’t,” like landscaping, housekeeping, bussing tables, and picking fruits and vegetables. Why won’t Americans ‘do’ these jobs? They don’t pay well enough and they’re dangerous, so illegals do them for less than Americans are willing to.

Get rid of the aliens, and hotels/commercial farms will have to provide safer environments and higher wages for LEGAL immigrants to work.

A living wage without government interference!

–JJM

Adventures in Puppyhood!

09/28/2008, 10:12 am -- by Djere | 3 Comments

Meet Reagan! (And Gorby the duck)

Official Wife Karen is a glutton for punishment. Whenever we would visit the mall, she would always make sure we stopped at the pet store to look at the puppies. I like dogs, so naturally I agreed to LOOK at the $1,000+ puppies in the mall, but never, ever, ever, ever, ever in a million years would we buy one there.

As much as I love her, Official Wife Karen is what you could call impulsive. So seeing puppies in the mall made her want them, checking account balance notwithstanding. Combine her impulsiveness with her gluttony for punishment and you have a recipe for disaster. I want that puppy, I want it now, and if you loved me you wouldn’t show me puppies we can’t afford.

We had been looking through ads in the newspaper to see the prices for different puppies for sale and had decided that we wanted a chocolate lab puppy named Albert Q. Einstein and a beagle puppy named Sir Isaac Newton. And of course, since we live in an apartment with a no-pet lease, we’d get them once we bought a house.

Yesterday morning, she wanted to look at puppies at the SPCA. LOOK at puppies. Look at puppies. Look, look, look, look, look.

Look, not buy. Continued here!

Best of Djere: Ethical Immorality

09/16/2008, 3:00 pm -- by Djere | No Comments

Originally published, July 2007.

unethical — not being in accordance with the rules or standards for right conduct or practice.
immoral — deliberately violating accepted principles of right and wrong.

The terms are used almost interchangeably these days, and I don’t know just how fair that is. In case this is your first visit to the planet, welcome to America, land of moral relativism.

Morality speaks to the inherent right-ness or wrong-ness of a given action, thought, or behavior. Regardless of the current pulse of the nation or flavor of the week, Morality exists and has existed from beyond the beginning of time.

Ethics are different. The problem with ethicality is that it changes from person to person, culture to culture, and time to time. I define ethics as the application of your values.

values — the ideals, customs, institutions, etc., of a society toward which the people of the group have an affective regard. These values may be positive, as cleanliness, freedom, or education, or negative, as cruelty, crime, or blasphemy.

Think of the things you value — freedom, money, family. The application of your values — which values take priority over other values — now that’s where you create your ethics. If a business organization places a high value on integrity or truthfulness, part of their code of ethics will reflect that importance. If a member were to deal unfairly with an associate, his actions would be unethical — contrary to the values of his organization.

Personal and organizational ethics are derived from values. Values are based upon two things — both a little farther removed from the lofty ethical ideals we think of as right and wrong. First, we base our values on likes and dislikes, two things which interact, change, morph, and ebb and flow as the years pass. Second, we base them on our experiences and observations.

Likes and dislikes, experience and observation give us the why behind the values which gives us the why behind the ethics. Like a pyramid, many experiences and observations combine into our likes and dislikes. Many likes and dislikes combine into our values. Several values combine into our ethics. The truest state of our ethics come from the bottom up, percolating from our past into our future.

Standing alone are morals. Being a Christian, I cannot believe anything but that morals are absolute. There is absolute supreme truth, and it is real and substantial. If morals are the thing, ethics are the shade, the shadow, the human approximation.

With the regeneration of ourselves through the redemptive work of Christ *should* come the regeneration of our code of ethics. Working in the hearts of men, the Holy Spirit Himself transforms us from the top down.

Nothing can change your past — your experiences, your observations, your hurts and past sins. What changes is your response to them, the forgiveness you receive, and hopefully, your values.

Best of Bweinh! — Crosswords v Sudoku

09/5/2008, 12:00 pm -- by Bweinh | 2 Comments

In this corner, arguing for the superiority of crosswords, is Djere!

And in this corner, on the side of Sudoku, is Tom!

The true gridiron classic, the crossword puzzle simply outclasses its numerical counterpart.

The crossword puzzle (in its modern form) dates to its 1913 invention by Arthur Wynne, but word squares have been found even under the ruins of Pompeii, a testament to their timeless popularity. Shortly after Wynne’s initial “Word-Cross,” the crossword puzzle again took the world by storm, easily becoming its most popular word game. Crosswords require finesse, creativity, logic, a firm grasp on language, and a sense of humor.

Sudoku, on the other hand (if that’s how it’s spelled), is a newcomer to the puzzle world, invented in 1974 by Howard Garns. Unlike the crossword, which requires creativity, logic, and knowledge, Sideko is solved by logic (or luck) alone.

And speaking of alone, Saduka is usually solved alone, a testament to the poor social and hygiene skills of its practitioners. The crossword is truly a democratic puzzle — the game of the everyman. Think back to the last time you saw someone hunched over a newspaper, pen (or for cowards, pencil) in hand. A crossworder may look up, make eye contact, and speak directly to you. “Hello, friend,” they might ask, “What’s a four letter word for ‘killer whale’?” It’s more than solitaire, it’s an interpersonal event… it’s proper socialization! It’s community!

Replay that scene in your mind, but substitute the lesser puzzle of Suck-doku. Instead of eye contact, your feral co-worker will likely make indiscriminate marks on the page, muttering to himself, never quite acknowledging your presence or humanity. Years later, after failing to complete even one square, he is, frankly, quite likely to snap and firebomb your company warehouse.

Oh yeah, and size does matter, baby. From the standard 15×15 grids of your weekday puzzle all the way up to the Weekly World News’s 35×35 Bigfoot puzzles, crosswords trounce Sakodu’s petty 9×9 grids. Aesthetically pleasing, the crossword contains radial symmetry, contrasting white and black squares in interesting designs. Suducu’s only claim to fame is that every puzzle is as boringly plain as the last.

What’s it going to be? The logic, beauty, and cruciverbial wonder of the crossword, or the irritatingly confining multiplication table that is Sydyky?

P.S. If anyone could help me with 26-Across — “Wish to a traveler,” eight letters? Yeah, thanks.

Crosswords and Sudoku are very similar, really.

Both combine the excitement of painstakingly filling out small grids in a strictly regimented way with the fun of sitting quietly. Both are presumed by many reliable sources as activities that build the intellect. And both are best enjoyed responsibly.

However, if one of the two had to be sacrificed from our nation’s coffee shops, subway trains, and lecture halls, the choice would be simple:

We would have to ditch the crossword.

Sudoku is, by its very nature, inclusive. Speaking the universal language of numbers, a Sudoku puzzle spreads its grid wide enough to encompass people from any culture, any walk of life.

Crosswords trend toward the opposite extreme of exclusion, taking on themes so obscure as to alienate the vast majority of those initially drawn to their checkerboard good-looks and witty tete-a-clue-tete. Glamour without warmth is not what I look for in a woman, and absolutely not what I want in a pastime.

Sudoku’s simple, yet elegant rules can be learned in minutes. Place each digit, 1-9, one time in each row, in each column, and in each 3-by-3 square.

Compare that to the nuances of a typical crossword puzzle. If there’s an abbreviation in the clue, does that mean the answer is abbreviated as well? In what tense do they want this word?

And what’s with all the Latin?

I’ll admit — Sudoku is a relatively new addition to the flashy world of the comic-page. But even considering the Jumble, word-search, and the behemoth that is the New York Times crossword, Sudoku remains one enigmatic David who can take up nine smooth digits and get the amusement done.

Which side are you on?

sigh

09/4/2008, 9:53 am -- by Djere | No Comments

Senator John McCain... in Muppet form

I mean, don’t get me wrong…

I’m voting for him…

But I wish he were a little more charismatic…

Russia Invades Georgia — Congratulations, Mr. Bush

08/12/2008, 11:42 pm -- by Djere | 4 Comments

Ready for an understatement? I’m frustrated.

I know that given the circumstances, invading Afghanistan was the right thing to do. It was clear from intelligence reports that the mastermind behind the 9/11 plot, Osama Bin Laden, was in hiding there, protected by the Taliban. To almost any impartial observer, Al-Qaeda’s declaration of war on America gave us enough of a justification to declare that war.

I know that the people of Iraq are better off today than they were under Saddam Hussein. Any impartial observer would tell you that despite the old reports of sectarian violence and naysayers predicting three-way civil war, a fledgling democratic government is starting to take root.

But none of that stops me from being so *expletive deleted* frustrated by the whole situation. It’s been nearly seven years since I watched over 2,600 people die on national television. Never before had so much pro-American support been poured out on a global scale, and where do we stand today? Internally and internationally, I would say we’re worse off than ever before, with absolutely no glimmer of hope on the horizon. Neither of our presidential candidates are worth their weight in spit and Americans are too busy worrying about what celebrity is anorexic this week and which one should be anorexic the next.

Even in our own back yard, two-bit leftist thugs spew anti-American hate as a platform for election, and have been growing in influence slowly but surely. How many South American countries even like us any more? How many European countries respect America? How many Americans respect America?

Russia invades Georgia, and we’re absolutely powerless to stop them. We have absolutely no pull in the former Soviet republics when we cannot provide aid to the most pro-Western democracy in the region. Sure, we can threaten Russia with long-term effects — raising insurance rates so they can’t host the Olympic Games, blocking Russian entry into the WTO, refusing to play war games with them…

I don’t know what the answer is. I’d love to tell you that a North American Union would be part of the solution (provided it were a conservative, regional government, not like the EU).

I just don’t know and it frustrates me.

What we need is Ronald W. Reagan. :(

Isaiah 44 — Part 2

06/30/2008, 12:00 am -- by Djere | No Comments

Tuesday, having come and now gone, brought with it a visit from missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I did my homework before they arrived, reading my copy of the Book of Mormon and jotting down notes from the Bible.

I didn’t want to scare them off or arrogantly present my faith to them. I wanted them to be comfortable, to open up and present their gospel so that I could calmly and rationally present the Gospel.

I certainly didn’t score any slam dunks, but I’d like to think that I got two shots in under their radar… two seeds that I hope and pray will take root and grow.

Seed 1 — God is spirit.
For those of you who aren’t familiar with LDS theology, I’ll bring you up to speed. They believe God the Father is a literal, physical person with a body of flesh and bone who is both physically and literally our father. (Doctrine & Covenants, Section 130:22)

The truth of God found in the Word is this:

John 4:24 (NKJV) — “God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.”

Luke 24:39 (NKJV) — “Behold My hands and My feet, that it is I Myself. Handle Me and see, for a spirit does not have flesh and bones as you see I have.”

God, being spirit, does not have a body of flesh and bone.

Seed 2 — No man can see God; only Jesus is immortal.
The missionaries were very excited to tell us that they know that Joseph Smith was a prophet because God Himself, literally in the flesh, along with Jesus Christ, literally in the flesh, appeared to ol’ Joey in the forest. Furthermore, when Jesus preached His Gospel to the Indians in America, he selected twelve disciples, three of whom will never die.

The truth of God found in the Word is this:

I Timothy 6:15-16 (NKJV) — “which He will manifest in His own time, He who is the blessed and only Potentate, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone has immortality, dwelling in unapproachable light, whom no man has seen or can see, to whom be honor and everlasting power. Amen.”

Earlier in I Timothy, Paul writes (1:17) that God is the “Eternal King, Immortal, Invisible.” If God is invisible and lives in unapproachable light wherein no man has or can see Him, how did Joe see him? Furthermore, if Jesus is the One “who alone has immortality,” how were three of Jesus’ Indian apostles granted immortality?

As I said, they’re not slam dunks, but the sisters wrote the verses down with notes like “God is Spirit?” next to them. I hope and pray the seeds take root, but we’ll find out on Thursday when they come back for another round.

Photoflash — Midwest Flooding

06/22/2008, 12:59 am -- by Djere | No Comments

This just in… Residents living in a Midwestern flood plain continue to be baffled and disturbed by yearly flooding. Flood plain residents confused on source of flood.